Sunday, October 21, 2007

That Time of Year

Well, it is that time of year again. Somewhere between summer activities, visitors and the just before the fall doldrums.

Life on the island starts to slow down somewhat with people returning to their homes abroad, the weather changing and the slow approach to the upcoming holidays looming in the distance.

Right now, during this period, my life has slowed down and I seem to be in a lazy mode. This is not like me at all as I am a very active person. But, every now and then I suddendly feel like doing absolutely nothing! Now, for a person like me, this is not acceptable. I feel I should be busy doing something. I mean, if not household projects (like cleaning, laundry, cooking and gardening) the I should be creating something for someone or preparing items for the holidays, or writing in my blog (which very people actually read) or taking photos.....SOMETHING.

People say that this is OK. But my mind just can't seem to adjust to this laid back attitude. I mean, it is ok to live on an island where manana is the way of life and accept that. It is ok to put off for tommorrow what I could do today. And, it is even ok, now and then, to take a siesta. But to actually lay around all day - especially on a perfectly sunny, clear, breezy day, and do nothing - unheard of, at least in my case.

Maybe it is the fact that I have so many projects lined up to do and know that I can't possibly meet my preset deadlines that I've decided to just ignore them! Maybe I feel that when I do actually finish a project, I know there will be another and another and another to follow and the fact that it never seems to cease may be getting me down.

However, I love to create. I love to see something being made out of the most ordinary items and I love the feel it gives me upon completion to know I have created this item. It seems that everything I do make, I give away. In actuality, I have very few of my own creations. I also know that when I see something I have made being displayed by the person it was given to, I am always astounded that I was the one that made it. While working on an item I tend to become really critical and in the end all I see are the small flaws that no one else (except for my husband) can detect. And believe me, he points all the flaws out immediately!

Of course it could simply be that having finished painting and varnishing my bedroom floor, getting new furniture installed and transferring items from the old to the new; making ice cream, breadsticks and pies; having 8 people over for lunch; managing the selling of island-made pine needle baskets to tourists by one of our islanders on a no-profit basis for me; handling the tiresome project of getting my computer to return to the states for service; mailing out 5 packages to friends and family of small gifts I think they will like......maybe I'm just worn out this week!

I guess I just need to relax for a while, read a good book, listen to some music and stop trying to try. But then, I wouldn't be me!